Because I can't sing an angst-filled rock ballad and make people fall in love with me
I'm in that mood where I can't decide what to type due to the sheer frustration I feel.
I don't get it. How can one person be so absolutely contrary to what you are and still stick around to annoy you.
I typed-backspaced-typed like a zillion times until deciding not to say anything because status updates are a sham. You type in some heartfelt message good or otherwise and later on when unsuspecting viewers ask you to explain yourself, you realize you can't. No one would understand and more often than not, it's a really stupid reason and it's embarrassing to reveal it.
Which is why I like my blog. No one really reads it. Not even my family or my best friends. Not even me. But I write this crap; I can't be expected to read it too. Let me just turn schizophrenic and start conducting conversations with myself.
Out loud.
I do speak to myself in my head; they're very intelligent conversations too. It's very hard to find someone who likes Marquez's brand of love and anyone who would be willing to sing the following to me.
The day someone does, I'd propose to him myself.
But sadly no one is particularly interested. Except one person whom I don't like. Because we are easily the most different people ever placed on this planet. Not to mention the fact that we can't go 30 seconds without getting into an argument. Not the cute kind either. The terribly lame, let-me-go-kill-myself kind. Ergo this post. And I'm very suspicious of his intentions too. [intentions. Ohmygod I'm stuck in an MnB again :/]
Someone should come along sometime soon. I'd hate to die alone with cats. It's a terrible prospect.
But if someone did, then who would write these terribly boring, angst-filled blogposts?
And what would my non-existent readership do then?
Yes, I do need a life. Thanks for pointing it out; imaginary reader.
I shall try this again....
ReplyDeleteI have a certain level of envy for anyone who can articulate their thoughts, observations, feelings into words and have them not sound sophomorish, cheesy or just plain stupid. I struggle with that. I admire your bravery as well, to put your heart and mind on display as you do. It is not something I have the confidence to do. I think you are brilliant and lovely. You are one of my favorite people and please don't stop writing....ever. Don't give two thoughts to people who say your writing is too anything unless they can give you concrete reasoning for their comments. Then give them one thought and keep going.
Hope to see you soon....we'll talk more then.
Sorry love, forgot to sign my name-it's me...Mami. : )
DeleteI am not an expert to comment on written work, but, if the writing makes one feel the organic, crystal clear, naked feeling behind the story, it is worth the readers time and a job well done by the author. "girls with a pearl earring" comes to mind. The story so depressing and dark, yet it is with still with me.
ReplyDeleteRegardless of genre, if you make the reader feel, you have succeeded!
Love you babe. Love your writing.
A comment from your 'mother jaesi'
'mother jaesi' leave a name next time :P
ReplyDeleteThanks :)
Your style if composition is like a marriage between a flirty, funny diary and the rawness of the mind and it's emotion-- Deliciously wonderful and bravely intimate :)
ReplyDeleteYour style of composition is like a marriage between a flirty, funny diary and the rawness of the mind and it's emotion-- Deliciously poetic and bravely intimate.
ReplyDelete