A letter to Mom and Dad

Dear mom and dad, it is just as well that you will not read this. God bless technology. This is not next on the list of letters to be written but I need to write this. I need to be furious enough to get out all the frustration of the last two months. And maybe by the end of this letter, I will let it go. Who knows.
You know I love you. So I'm not wasting time saying that. I need to tell you about the amazingly vast gap between us over the last two months. I don't know how, or why, but seemingly you can't understand me anymore. Or maybe I have lost the patience to try and make you understand.
Mom, I am like you; and I love the fact but I'm not someone who takes all that suffering and bottles it up and doesn't say anything. I care about everything; maybe a little too much and I need to tell you. I need to get angry; and scream and shout and I will be okay. But for those ten minutes/half hour/two days; let me be.
Dad, I love you most in this world. You are my first best friend and will always be; but you need to stop being  stubborn and understand me. I am not a child; I know what I am doing. Even if I don't have an informed decision of my career yet; I know that I will do something enough to support myself. I want to become a writer and I want to help society. I can't bear the thought of the Civil Services because that is your dream not mine. If you come back home and berate me about my weight, I will go out of my way to NOT go to the gym. I am a teenager; we do things like this. I love you for 75% of the day. But that remaining time; I hate you and I don't want that. I was never the girl who cribbed about her parents and I don't want to be now. But  you gotta loosen the strings a little; you're suffocating me.
me

Comments

  1. UnknownSeptember 21, 2011 at 7:25 AM

    I really can't comment or criticize on this, because you have courageously written from your heart. I have no right to patronize or question your feelings. No one has. But I will say one thing-- Don't you dare feel guilty.
    -Yoga

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

pearls of wisdom

Popular posts from this blog

the perfect evening

He entered the room with the expert walk of a tiger out on a prowl. With the air of a veteran he cast a roving eye over the crowd. He knew just where and how he would spend the rest of the evening. He had already selected those who would have the honour of his company. And he had selected his corner. A vantage point overlooking the room and an arm’s length from the much needed bar. The bar was his anchor. In this mind-numbingly boring party he knew the only way he was going home at the end of the evening was copious amounts of alcohol. He hated these events. All these socialites attempting to be so cool. Delhi was fun. Delhiites were the devil reincarnate. All those Punjabis ladies with derrieres needing two chairs. Dripping with gold. Dressed in flashy saris. And their wonderful, faithful husbands. Who looked at women as if they were a piece of meat. He couldn’t take it. He admired women. He loved women. All sorts. Well, the nice sorts anyway. And he showed his appreciation all right.
Read more

Because I can't sing an angst-filled rock ballad and make people fall in love with me

I'm in that mood where I can't decide what to type due to the sheer frustration I feel. I don't get it. How can one person be so absolutely contrary to what you are and still stick around to annoy you. I typed-backspaced-typed like a zillion times until deciding not to say anything because status updates are a sham. You type in some heartfelt message good or otherwise and later on when unsuspecting viewers ask you to explain yourself, you realize you can't. No one would understand and more often than not, it's a really stupid reason and it's embarrassing to reveal it. Which is why I like my blog. No one really reads it. Not even my family or my best friends. Not even me. But I write this crap; I can't be expected to read it too. Let me just turn schizophrenic and start conducting conversations with myself. Out loud.  I do speak to myself in my head; they're very intelligent conversations too. It's very hard to find someone who likes Marqu
Read more
"I don't like you." "who the hell likes you?!" and she walked off. One day. One day i will hack her to tiny little pieces and stand and laugh. and i will be the happiest person alive. That nauseating; suffering idiot will have died and i could then live my life in peace. yes, i hate her. and you probably are right now going: wha-? So i will tell you everything. starting with that floating piece of fluff's name. her name is namrata. we're family friends. now we study together. she detests me. i hate her with a passion i never knew i possessed. but why? one asks us, quite often. why? because that foolface is my best friend. and no one infuriates me more.                    * jackass. jackass. such a jackass! what the hell! I gets the highest mark, he fails. and it is my fault?! oh yes, because i study. and i'm supposedly a "floating piece of fluff". jackass!!!!! who? arjun. family friend and now "best friend".
Read more